Lemon Street

Riding my bike through the streets of Orange County
Anaheim, Fullerton, Placentia
rubber band around my pant leg
to keep it from getting caught in the sprockets
2 am, riding home after work
double shift waitressing at Villa Sonora
not bad food, actually..
about a 30 min ride
from Raymond and Commonwealth
to downtown Anaheim

My first apartment
on Lemon Street
the old part of town
between two beautiful parks
Pearson to the South, La Palma to the North
walking or biking distance from anywhere
I needed to go
building must have been 100 years old
more like 80, I guess
old enough at any rate, to have endured the Big Flood
(the house next door used to have a basement
now full of mud)
who would think, to look at it now, the Santa Ana river
could have ever flooded
all the way to downtown Anaheim?

The apartment was huge
one in a fourplex
I lived downstairs, on the left
front door was paned glass
floor lenghth windows
on either side
curtained by me, in Indian prints
aka "tapestries"
huge kitchen with built-in oak hoosier
and a cupboard/ice box that vented to the outdoors
from pre-refrigerator days
full size Okeefe-Merritt stove
cooked many a meal for my hipster friends/family/neighbors/strangers
huge tub in bathroom
teeny-tiny closet in the bedroom
hell, all I wore was jeans anyway
I had no furniture when I moved in
not even a bed
I bought a piece of foam and slept on it for awhile
later I had a water bed
In the living room I built the proverbial
board and box shelving unit
all the way up the freakin wall!
boxes pilfered from the back of liquor stores
you know, the wooden 7-up boxes you don't see anymore
or pay an arm and a leg for at some flea market
an orange crate for my record collection
an antique library table from (Jane? Nola?)
and a 1932 Lincoln Sectional sofa
bought from my friend Judy for $10
this is what I lived with
in 1971

The house next door
where I first met Robert
who'd hang with me into the wee hours
drinking Tuaca
talking about our tragic loves
before he was off to bigger and better things
(Hollywood)
later occupied by JL
and all his brilliance and rage
he could fill an entire room
with his presence
and dazzle you with his musical genius
pained, raw voice
haunted words
I was madly in love with the guy
never realized it until many years later

Four apartments in my building
and one next door above the big green house
(who lived in the house below? we never knew!)
One by one all filled with my friends
we became a little community
(picture Melrose Place ha ha)
volleyball games in the back yard
fierce games of 500 rummy and/or slammin' dominos
huge feasts of tacos, veggie when the meat ran out
a guy from across the street came over and made lasagna once
what was his name? Al?
left all his bottles of spices
the beginnings of my (future) well-stocked kitchen
few of us had real jobs
just enough to keep us going
and drugs, of course
(what was the saying - drugs will get you through times of no money
better than money will get you through times of no drugs)
mostly pot
but then there was the time M J came over with opium
everyone smoked it, including me
everyone got high (if you can call it that
more like plastered all over the carpet)
except me
didn't take
oh well
did I miss anything?

Then there was the music
JL and D
and the guy with the electric accordion
amazing stuff
all the different incarnations of that little band
but for me, it was always (only) the two of them
really, the one of them...
following them (him) around to the clubs
where they played, doing mostly covers
but that was.. OK
I knew what they could really do

lying awake on a summer night
strains of The Boxer
drifting through my open window
over and over and over
drove Nola flippin crazy in the apt. upstairs
but I loved it

Nola and Mark upstairs
the sane ones
trying to have a baby
not in the cards
meanwhile E next door
aborts her own child
Mike's baby
that's my boyfriend, Mike
(the slut couldn't wait til I was out of town
so she could screw him)
Nola and Mark
trying to adopt
Nola wondering if she should put on (dreaded) makeup
so she wouldn't look pale at the adoption interview

Upstairs on the right
Victor and Janet
why was she so jealous of me?
never got that concept
I guess maybe I do now

Kim next door
who was a good friend
for many years
until she betrayed me

Judy and Gary (upstairs before Nola)
Judy kept me from killing myself
when I was riding that edge
many years later, I returned the favor

I feel like I lived a whole life in that apartment!

and Michael

Mike came home with me one night
and never left
Mike whom I'd had a crush on
ever since he lived next door to my sister
then married to his first wife
now divorced
on the prowl, so I thought
I was game
never thought I could keep him
but when he kissed me
the whole world opened up
we'd hold so tight I thought we'd melt into each other
we loved with incredible passion
and fought with the same
six years
then one apart
then back again
but that little seed, that little dark cell
continued to grow and fester
drugs and alcohol
too much
too much
too much
and the day to day living that never saw a future
infidelity - on both our parts
the constant fighting
my heart ripping apart
every damn day
until I finally
had
to
leave

About everyone else had moved on by then
Nola and Mark to Alaska
Judy and Gary bought a house
Janet left Victor
Victor drifted
Mike stayed another year or two
then moved on

Years later I was with someone
on some errand
found ourselves in my old neighborhood
stopped at a house directly across the street
from my old apartment
I sat in the car while he went inside
stared at my old home
just a building